Me, the farthest star

Running with a heavy heart,
yet on the same place i land , struggled to find millions of ideas
that would take me a few more yard,
whole lot of tries wasted as it always did
At last i ended up landing on the same place again
My efforts deviating me , leaving me in vain
I thus chose to stay lame ,
no further deeds favoring me to begin
Apart from the idea that takes me nowhere in the end
Each trial being a lost ring in the big ocean
I neither find its end nor it's beginning
I could never put it on to move towards tomorrow 
neither could leave it to be like how i am today
Silently i obeyed life, following its every steps
That taught me the only lesson i previously could have guessed
when you start giving something to someone whoever it is
There arrises no questions on your purity, are you even taking?
World is going on, none of them demand my presence
i could never make place for myself, every try that led me go insane
Every single star i see,
I see them fight to shine as brighter as they can be
Very few they fall off being a wish
Few they chose to stay far and don't even get noticed.…

Forced prostitution, Lets set it free!!

Under the clear blue sky i held my head up
Up to see those creatures flying there
Flattering their wings in search of what they need
I see them keenly, making me feel for a while that they are me

Because i know, within those dark scary room i cant held my head up to see
In front of those money masters whose pleasure i need to be
Yes, i need to make them satisfy, killing myself inside
So, i stare at them , their parallel wings

How freely they fly,
they can move anywhere, wherever they want to be
So i stare at them, Until my eyes hurt
Until they reach that horizon, Until they cross the ball of fire
Leaving my eyes to dark again
Leaving my soul to get scared again
Leaving my body to be played again
I am limited, limited within these bars

I know the way to get out, even i have the keys to be out
But i don't want to open them
I know most of the ones like me who got off,
opened the keys to get to the stars

May be they are happy now But i don't want that happiness
I want to know how its like to be set free
How its like to run without someone chasing you

How its like to be wished for your soul
without your body being forced to get close
my soul in this open air, feeling its presence
my heart getting wider in this brightness

i have burnt my desires, Coated the ashes all over my body,
this is the joy of freedom, i cant resist myself ,
i need to go celebrate But where do i go?
Wings are taking me getting  faster with its blow

But this joy is taking me nowhere
I get hit by the hard rain to be back to the same dark room again
To get rusted there, my desires filling my soul again
Feelings and hopes of setting me free is haunting me every night
Yet i don't want to be a star ,i fear if i be one without getting to see the real world,
Oh, my bad, i wish to be the star, i wish i was the one on the ground ...

Only if she understood

She, being a magician to me,
whole days and nights 
Encirling her shadows, roaming around i be
She just want me go, but i have been into her magic
Its real hard trying to get farther, how i wish she understands it

Instantly getting close when i feel she wants me near, 
Throws me away when i wish to get dragged towards her 
I have been a unwanted piece of paper
Though sometimes i peep out of a bin 
In a hope she sees me , unfolds my heart
Stretches and goes through it to fix the piece
Even if she doesnt, i just want to let her know, 
I have been into her magic,she should stop it to let me go

When i free my soul,she hides
And there are times when she occupies, 
Its no strange for me,
Coz, in one way or the other everytime, there she is
Deep down even though i know she has never been

In a single look, u think she looks at me?
No, she takes me in, i am dragged into her place
Keeps me in there until she looks away what if I could do so?
I would just be looking at her  my entire life would have no break
Looking away would feel no better then

Life would never demand more,not a single thing would require replacements
Nothing that distracts me would make sense
it just has a moon , I would be no jealous of this earth
I mean,seriously, it would be a greatest boon having her

But only if she understood, its hard being tucked in these two
Either she should feel me back like how i am doing
Or else about her magic that i have been into
If she doesn't feel me, i just want to let her know,
I have been into her magic,she should simply stop it to let me go.…

Under the shade, forever she waits

The moon silently followed as she headed the dead end street
Walking alone made her feel, it never really left her to be
Her body and her soul, being guided nowhere
She laid down there to smile at it and she started to share

All her day how she missed it when all above was clouded
Her life would never be the same
if she hadn't found the one with whom she shared
How she worried the dark, when it went off for days

Slowly and swiftly how it came back to lighten her up,
to bring back her grace As soon the Night starts,
fear rumbles around her heart, And She thanked to god,
she had it,the moon to brighten the dark

The times she didn't see it, her soul never left searching
never losing hope, she believed it comes to her only
It needs sometime too beside hearing her cry and seeing her in pain
May be it also sheds off tears to mix it up with the rain

it may be like how she felt to leave when she really wanted to be left alone
But she used to come to it and it broke her to know,it has left and forever gone
As when summer comes and it happily brings the leaves along
To dry those off, make it fall quickly, not letting it see the winter even

Let it vanish, she thought to wait her lifetime in the name her life belongs
But the clouds are never leaving, killing her soul everyday in the hope that it comes..

Emptiness

Staring constantly at a wall
Thinking nothing for a while
You may say i am dreaming
But having left that years ago
i just keep my eyes still
at a point, where nothing seems to move
The point where i see myself,

My past, where i was and my coming days where i am going to be
And that's been like my habit
I don't remember the point where i started,
neither do i plan when to stop
I just go numb inside,
as if all the forces are uniting to keep me alive
making me feel like they are the one helping me breathe,

Helping the past me to stand today as a present me
all the zumbled worries they unfold right there i find a lead to keep me go
with a faint pain they get washed even more
i am then relieved like i had never had those..

So that's like my fighting back, the fight with myself
since with creator i never had any complains
No one is uselessly made, there is no doubt for sure
Somewhere to use myself i am up, so don't ask me why did i do so

I don't have answer to those silly questions
To those who want to believe,these are the ways i feel, the ways my heart heal..

Until she sleeps

A small paper work hangs on the ceiling
Enormously colored with her desire
a young heart at its most had made it look much prettier
Red seeming thick, thicker than the molasses

Used to go into her nerves as she woke up
Making her day even brighter, filling her soul with more blood
Blue kept her calm,slight vague than the red one
the light as it fell on it,that bluish glow used to keep her warm
The way she used to start her day and end similarly
Until the day she choose to lay in her bed, the eyes stared constantly
It stroke all of us apart, the red didn't hit her nerves

Even when she looked straight at the ceiling
It was strange, her heart stopped but beauty rose up and that was stunning
By next day red faded, blue thinned even more
Cobwebbed,It hung there inanimately,watching her go

She was coffined to be taken to graveyard, Near her mother's grave,
everyone knew that would be better, But no one did know what actually was
Her mother had never returned to complete the blue
She had her life in the paper that she drew


The lighter blue, with all her labor she made it look dark at her best
Willing to take it along with her, she herself moved to stay there where her mother rests